I am locked

I am locked in a prison by caregivers,
positioned as a despicable imbecile,
if only I hadn’t pined my hopes on her,
hope crushed, no life for a long while.

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I am a loser

I am a loser,
lost all I’ve got,
not any the wiser,
belong now to the hopeless sort,
slowly start to pitiful rot;

once hope whisked away,
nothing is there,
each moment painful disarray,
no roads to take anywhere;

Life is done,
there’s no pardon,
caged within the walls,
where no passion or profession calls;

Can’t be glad for delusions gone,
for then disillusionment reign,
Oh, who can ever understand,
the misery of one who has nothing to do;

time heals pain is okay for some,
time is pain for one who has to kill time.

I am happy

I am happy today about my life. I don’t know about tomorrow. Each day steady sway, no new mysteries. In the quest for writing I almost lost the all important skill of reading. I no longer wish to be a creator, I want to enjoy finer things in life like books and movies. But stuck at this moment even reading a book or seeing a movie seems an uphill task. Slowly I gotta ease back into my old self and old life. My goal has shifted from being successful to being a simpleton leading a simple life. I need support for this cause, for as much for successful, leading a simple life is tough pursuit. 

I used to dream

I used to dream with lavish wonder,
I used to think no surrender,
until one too many an opportunity,
I tore apart with such impunity;

I used to enjoy life bottoms up,
until I truly hit rock bottom,
eluded even the layman’s soiled cup,
not a single thing that I can drum;

excuses galore kept me on easy lane,
until they dried up into a harsh cane,
not a pathetic excuse to keep living,
all the years passed have no meaning;

the secret of life is instincts banal,
unlike most, can’t steer in civil canal,
caught in the act, no shame anymore,
brain took backfoot and heart tore,

there is evidence of love all around,
but why not in my withering heart bound.

When love betrays

When love betrays you,
of family, friends and sweeet heart,
and your truth betrays too,
and death not option aloft;

sanity already breached,
why happened thus,
god part betrayed leached,
but evil mind matters of sexual fuss;

went beyond moral probity,
actions of mind don’t count held,
did when spent money without priority,
all life wasted idly gelled;

not important is okay,
but what is the impotent sway.